The unicorn search continues

As done previously with my desire for my boytoy, I am once again putting my wishes out into the universe and I have faith that these desires will once again be fulfilled.


So, what does this elusive gal pal (a.k.a. unicorn) encompass? In my mind's eye, she is 20something, in the 5foot height range, has some meat on her, she's not a fussy eater, or high maintenance. She is a true bisexual, not "curious" or whatever, but has some real life experience. Conversely, not someone with so much experience that it makes our roleplaying and fun and games more work than play. Nothing hardcore.
A young lady of taste and class that is seeking an equally classy dom as a mentor, friend and lover. Someone that has poise, manners and sophistication or at least enough of a good foundation of those qualities, that it makes it a pleasure to smooth out the rough edges. Truth is, you can't make a diamond out of a piece of coal.

She would have to possess the intellectual capacity to keep me stimulated and someone that loves to learn, has an open mind and is a true sub. Novices are such a bore, unsure and untrained. Seldom worth the time and effort it would take to finesse them. Furthermore, she would require a stout psychological base and understand that while we may play taboo oriented games, I am not interested in replacing or addressing her "mommy" issues.

A young lady with great time management skills, so that she has varied interests in her life, but can manage her time well, and doesn't try to control our relationship with "I am busy" but rather understands her importance of her role as my loyal and dedicated pet. I do after all make the time and give forth the effort to look after my pets well. That might be one key reason why I have so many boomerangs return. Even those I haven't met in real life.

You know, as I read over what I wrote, it seems like what I am truly seeking is.....me. In my 20's. Now that I think about it, no wonder my older friends were always been so taken with me. Sure, I look good (decent enough anyways), but it was those other qualities that made being with me and teaching me and guiding me, a pleasure for them as well.

Anyhow, I have faith as mentioned previously, that the universe will once again answer my call as it did when it sent Sterkarm into my loving arms.

Faith....what is it?

I have been doing a great deal of thinking lately and most of it is centered around "faith". No, not in the religious sense, never have and never will have any use or faith in manmade religious institutions. But rather, faith on a more personal level. Like faith in someone else. Faith in my own radar. When to give up faith and when to stay the course.

Have met the most darling man in all my life. One who makes me feel like a teenager again, full of wonder and excitement and yes, horny like one. But it seems that I have acquired the full package, including insecirities I thought long since dealt with.
This is where the "faith" issue has been coming up, because he has never given me a reason to doubt his sincerity or his love for me. He says he is going to do something, he does it. He says he is going to be somewhere, he is. So I guess I have put my faith in him and every now and again, I question it. There is no foundation for this I know, but I guess it's still remnants leftover from "The Year from Hell".

Another "friend" who I had put my faith and trust in, well, I don't want to relive the whole thing, but I just only yesterday got my computer back from the police where it was taken in over a year ago as "evidence" in a case against him.
Just can't seem to work up the faith again or the trust. It is broken beyond repair and he can't seem to understand that he did it to himself. No gift certificate or donuts will restore my faith in him and there certainly can be no restoration to what we were before. Guess here, I have given up hope and faith. Sad, yes, but how many times should I let someone hurt me before I do?